haiz. sucky mood.
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Noticed that i have not been really smiling or laughing,
ever since i started my new job.
I donno y also.
i don have any feel in doing anything
everyday is like a walking zombie.
really is sians to the max.
Been dragging myself to work all along,
and showing ppl my fake smile in shop.
i didnt wan to but i just cant..
Y is all this happening to me?
I should have just stay in Nokia till they terminate me.
Rather than making my life so difficult now in Singtel.
Colleagues all are selfish freaks.
Asked them things all say donno,
if not jiu say they are busy then ask me to ask someone else.
No wonder singtel sales really getting bad to worst.
haiz..
what to do?
If is not because of the contract penalty,
i tink i have already left long time ago.
Whereas now im still struggling with it,
im so tired..
Every night i been having insomnia.
and now,
Seeing wat my dear had write in the previous post,
i ?
really donno wat to say or nth to say
nvm ba..
No one can understand how i feel deeply inside my heart.
Recently nv update my blog..
Cos im too tired and no mood to update.
Reach home late everyday,
and have to wake up early the next day.
Schedule for this week is not bad,
but i tink next week will be a hell week for me.
Hopefully chinagal can get back to me asap.
If not i really can die in singtel.
Meet up with dear today after my work.
Was expecting to have some OT but heng..
in the end no need OT at all.
End work at around 545pm,
whatsapp dear what the plan tonight,
and he replied : " hmmmm. hahahaz. eat liaoz then send u home"
Make me more sian straight.
I was happily awaiting to end work,
then to see what he had planned for me.
in the end.....
i really nth to say..
Was quite disappointed after seeing the way he replied me,
and my mood changed straight away.
Met up with him outside my shop,
and was kinda speaking in a harsh way to him.
its like im waiting to end work and hoping for some happy things,
then suddenly every mood is gone.
Work already so sian now,
the only thing motivate me to await end work is the thought of meeting him after work.
But its seem like nth special to him at all ba.
he can plan other things well,
except planning things for me.
Am i really that un-important to him?
Can't blame him also ba...
he got more important things waiting for him to do..
Went to Ramenplay to have our dinner in there.
Chit chat till his work things,
and we argue again.
Already no mood liaoz,
plus this thing happened,
make me totally no mood and don feel like talking at all.
After eating,
walk towards the bus stop and asked him where he wanna go.
If he say go home,
i can straight take bus 502 home.
But lucky he didnt say that.
He said go marina square..
So we took bus 111 to marina square,
and throughout the whole journey,
we didnt talk at all.
He was busying whatsapp-ing with ppl,
and just ignoring me all the way.
In order not to disurb him whatsapp-ing,
i close my eye to rest my eye.
So i cant see him whatsapp-ing ppl.
Its to console myself so i can feel better.
Alight the bus that time
he was still whatsapping there,
till crossing the road,
and the route to the doll catcher machine.
I already tried to pretend not to see it,
and walk asap as i can.
I tink he realize that i getting to walk faster and faster,
then he follow up with me behind.
Played with doll machine and my mood slightly feel better.
Vent everything on the machine and just played whatever i can.
Keep changing money to catch the doll that i wan,
and managed to catch 2 cats first.
They have no stocks for the one that i wan,
so we need order it.
After 2 weeks then have.
Walk over to arcade and play some gun shooting games.
Just nice also..
Totally vent out everything in me on the shooting,
but its seem that i quite sucky in venting it out.
Vent out but my character died very fast.
Walk back to the doll machine side and continued catching.
was supposed to play the last $3,
in the end,
we played additional of $20 ba?
Not to sure also.
Total catch of today is 4 cats,
all the 4 design that they have,
i already got it.
Need to pack my cupboard to welcome my this new family.
Walk over to esplanade to relax awhile,
and tink mood is slightly better liaoz.
chit chat with dear in the usual place that we always sit.
its seen that today de atmosphere is not that good ba.
We didnt really talk alot then most of the time we are just quietly sitting there.
A long waiting end work day,
become a day of unhappiness day.
I feel like banging myself on the wall,
as im the one who make it become like that.
F**k myself to the max.
Its okays.
just ignore me..
Signs off,
JingJing
♥ 3:43 AM
